i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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