glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
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