Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
