oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
you would pick up someone in the library
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
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