Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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