went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
it's like heaven, but drunker
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize