we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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