YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
