dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
