you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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