last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
