Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
