I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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