Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Is it penis luge time yet?
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
