why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.