farters have to be the big spoon...
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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