After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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