It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize