His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
