I just saw a hot homeless man
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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