We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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