Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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