The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
