He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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