honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Randomize