I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
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