I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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