Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
