i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Randomize