so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
