yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i just google imaged poop.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
