saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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