I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
