There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Fuck me I smell like cheese
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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