textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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