Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
