The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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