I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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