I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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