Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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