My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
