Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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