is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize