Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
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