The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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