Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
