Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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