Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Randomize