You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
