so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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