apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I have feelings that need drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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